The Illusion of Control

ONE

Fear is the emotional response to the possible loss of something loved.  

It is appropriate to fear the loss of what is objectively important when that good thing is at risk.

Fear becomes disordered, it becomes anxiety and worry when –

·       When it is unlikely that what we fear will happen;

·       When we blow way out of proportion just how bad it will be;

·       When we forget that No matter what happens, no matter what we lose in this life God will bring about an even greater good for us and our loved ones if we trust and love Him.

So many of us are suffering from anxiety because we have lived our whole lives under the illusion of control. We think that if we have enough foresight, make the right preparations, take the right actions, control all the variables - we can protect ourselves and our loved ones from loss.

This is an illusion! There are infinite possible variables, threats and opportunities. Can you foresee and control them all? Of course not. Who can? God.

God is in control.

The will of God is the supreme cause of all things – what He does directly or what He allows to happen, though not causing it.

The will of God is essentially good, that is - for the benefit of all.

All things – prosperity or adversity – contribute to the good of those who love God.

We are in the hands of God Our Father.  You are safe!

TWO

In Luke 12 Jesus tells us

“Do not to worry about your life and what you are to eat, nor about your body and how you are to clothe it. For life means more than food, and the body more than clothing. Think of the ravens. They do not sow or reap; they have no storehouses and no barns; yet God feeds them. And how much more are you worth than the birds! Can any of you, for all his worrying, add a single moment to his span of life? If the smallest things, therefore, are outside your control, why worry about the rest?...Sell your possessions and give alms. Get yourselves purses that do not wear out, treasure that will not fail you, in heaven where no thief can reach it and no moth destroy it. For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.

Jesus does not forbid us from being responsible and generous but He absolutely forbids useless worry and the false illusion that we can control everything.

Jesus commands two things here: Stop useless worry and be generous.

Jesus emphasizes two things here: “If the smallest things, therefore, are outside your control, why worry about the rest?...Sell your possessions and give alms.”

THREE

So, to make this practical: if you or someone comes to you and says “I am struggling with worry and anxiety.”

In response you should ask, “What is the cause of your anxiety: Is it Covid, the elections, the degeneracy of society, the state of the Church…?” Let them answer and listen. When they stop. Let there be a space of silence…because they will add more.

Then ask: “Do you have control over any of that?” No. “Who does have ultimate control over this?” God Does.

Ok then, now we see that your anxiety is putting yourself in the place of God because you are worrying about what God is in charge of. The world is God’s project. Not yours.

Stop worrying about what isn’t your responsibility. In practice, that means cut back on the news, since looking at the news means thinking about what you are not responsible for and cannot control. Stop it and your anxiety and worry will fade.

FOUR

OF COURSE, WE DO HAVE AREAS THAT WE ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR.

What are you responsible for? Identify those specific things. Are you doing what you ought about those things?

It’s not our job to create and govern a universe. We are not competent to run the world. But we are responsible to care for, grow and give away what God has given to us.

St Francis DeSales, in his book Introduction to the Devout Life, in the chapter on The Practice of Poverty for the Wealthy, gives these crucial principles to avoid useless worry.

First, do your best to take care for what God has given you; Second, grow what God has given us. Third, to protect against greed, be generous in giving away some of what God has given you.

St Francis De Sales says:

Be more concerned than unbelievers to put your possessions to better use and make them more fruitful. Are not gardeners of kings attentive and more diligent about cultivating and making beautiful the gardens in their charge than they are of their own? Why? Because they appreciate the fact that these gardens belong to the king, whom they wish to please. Our possessions are not our own; God has given them to us to cultivate and he wishes us to render them fruitful and useful by taking care of them. …Let us therefore be diligent in our care for our earthly goods, even to increase them if some legitimate opportunity arises and our situation calls for it.

But be careful that self-love does not deceive you; sometimes it counterfeits the love of God so well that we can easily be fooled by it. To prevent this from happening and to prevent the care of earthly goods from becoming greed, it is essential that you frequently practice real poverty while possessing the riches that God has given you. Always detach yourself from some portion of what you possess by giving it willingly to the poor. To give is to impoverish self by that amount.

FIVE

AND DON’T FORGET, EVEN IN THE AREAS YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR, GOD’S STILL IN CONTROL.

Here is something really beautiful. The Little Way for which St. John Paul II made Therese of Lisieux at Doctor of the Church is simply the recognition that I am God’s project. My salvation and my perfection are His project and work. Not mine alone. Yes, I must respond with His grace. But the work is His.

Yes, we do have to make decisions, and we have to try to make good ones.

But those decisions don’t have to cause anxiety either. Just follow the steps of prudence:

1.  Think about it and pray about it.

2.  Settle on a course of action

3.  Follow through with your resolution unless some new, relevant information arises that should lead you to reconsider.

And be at peace. Because God’s still in control, and even if you don’t always make the best decisions, as long as we try and we offer everything to God, He’ll be able to work great things, even with our imperfections.

Remember – God turns all things for good for those who love him.